Tell kids you know the pain is real, and that you and the other caring adults in their lives can help solve whatever the problem is.
Quick tip 2
Ask about school.
Ask about school.
Help kids open up by asking open-ended questions, like “What’s the hardest thing you’re working on?” or “Who are you eating lunch with?”
Quick tip 3
Talk about stress.
Talk about stress.
Explain that stress can come out in different ways — like stomachaches — and there are things they can do to cope with those feelings.
Quick tip 4
Try not to avoid school.
Try not to avoid school.
If the stomachache is stress-related, explain that not going to school today can make kids more anxious about going tomorrow.
Some kids rarely get stomachaches. For others, it’s a common occurrence — especially on school days. They often wake up with pain that’s bad enough to make them want to stay home or not attend class.
What’s causing their frequent stomach problems? It might be something physical, like constipation or lactose intolerance. But stomachaches can also be caused by stress.
Doctors sometimes call this type of stomachache “psychosomatic” because it’s triggered by thoughts. While the cause isn’t physical, the pain is real. (Migraines are also often caused by stress.)
Stress doesn’t only cause pain — it can also affect our tolerance for pain. For example, a gas bubble might not bother us much when we’re happy and well-rested. But it might be very uncomfortable when we’re tired and stressed.
Frequent stomachaches or visits to the school nurse can sometimes be a sign that kids are struggling in school. The challenges may be academic or social.
No matter what the cause, starting a dialogue is a good first step to find out what’s going on.
Dive deeper
Signs that trouble at school is causing stress
All kids experience stress. But kids who learn and think differently face challenges that can add to that stress level. They may not have the words to describe what they’re feeling or to ask for help.
Common signs that school challenges are causing stress include trouble concentrating, angry outbursts, and avoiding school on test days.
If you’re a parent or caregiver, it’s important to talk with your child about the stomachaches to find out what’s going on. Even if you think your child is “faking it,” something real is happening that needs to be addressed. It might be trouble with reading or other difficulties with schoolwork. Or maybe it’s social anxiety related to bullying.
It’s also important to talk about the snowball effect. Staying home might seem like a good idea in the short term, but help your child understand why missing school today can make it harder to catch up tomorrow.
Next steps
The best way to help with stomachaches (and other problems) is to know what triggers them. You can learn a lot by observing kids and looking for patterns in their behavior. When do the stomachaches happen? What else is going on at those times?
This is valuable information you can share with others to find solutions.
Get tips for observing kids and looking for patterns. Talk with a health care professional about what you’re seeing. Whatever the cause, they can help figure out the best way to approach it.
Families and teachers can also share what they’re seeing and work together to make it easier for kids to deal with stress and not miss school.
Show empathy.
